First off, I'd like to say that the rumors are true. I do indeed have a cyst, oh wait, this is Raquetblog. The rumors are true, Cat and I did not actually play the game of raquetball for our first match. We actually played tennis outside at the Alberta Park. Tennis? you say. Well, we didn't get our shit together, it was hot and humid and it was down to our last possible day to make an arrangement to play. We figured out what our priorities were (spending money on going out to breakfast and then playing tennis for free, or working out a plan to get to a raquetball court and)... We decided on breakfast with Halle and a sweaty game of tennis. You will notice, leaguemates, that the game IS logged as a win for Cat, which is also true. She did win the tennis match, fair and square. However, it is important to also know that we flipped a coin to determine if we would actually claim this as a real "win". Heads meant that Cat could claim it as a raquetball win, and tales meant we would flip again to see who would claim the game as a forfeited win.
Long story short, if you feel cheated I am positive I will make it up to you when you have to play me, because as I discovered from playing my match with Annalisa, raquetball is really hard and I am really bad at it. I'm afraid of the ball, I have no hustle, I don't actually understand many of the rules, and my best move is the phantom swing.
The phantom swing, is really embarrassing and I have only played with two of my better friends. I have a hard time imagining that it won't be incredibly awkward to phantom swing in front of a stranger. It's like going on a blind date or something and tooting audibly during the conversation. I alsocan't control my yelling when I miss the ball or when it comes flying at me. I can't help but think about my high school literature teacher, who was always walking around with kleenex in her hands because she had a constant drip coming out of her nose. Her face was slightly off, not like in an asymmetrical way, but because a RAQUETBALL had smacked into her face and she needed to have reconstructive surgery.
Whatever. I am glad to be active and am looking forward to improving immensely. I just need some coaching. So, if anybody wants to double up our games sometime, maybe we could coordinate together. Alright----see you on the court.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
1 comment:
Did you just say you want to double up? Dang girl, you nasty.
Seriously, though, if I can give you one tip it's this: don't try to control your yelling. Embrace it. Grunt. Squeal. Scream obscenities. Shake the very foundations with your mighty barbaric yawp.
I'll put an asterisk next to the win for last week to indicate the . . . irregularities involved.
Post a Comment